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Book Review: The Four Agreements

It's 138 pages of great advice. "The Four Agreements: A Toltec Wisdom Book" has four strong lessons. Written by Don Miguel Ruiz, it's a quick read that could make you want to make changes in your life, or at least re-think the way you choose to take things personally.

The Four Agreements:

1. Be Impeccable with Your Word

The word is so powerful that one word can change a life or destroy the lives of millions of people.

2. Don't Take Anything Personally

Nothing other people do is because of you. It is because of themselves. People can hook you easily with one little opinion and feed you whatever poison they want, and because you take it personally, you eat it up. If you tell me something insulting, it is only because you're having a bad day, and you're dealing with your own issues and shortcomings. I was only the excuse for you to be cruel.

"If someone is not treating you with love and respect, it is a gift if they walk away from you. If that person doesn't walk away, you will surely endure many years of suffering with him or her. Walking away may hurt for a while, but your heart will eventually heal. Then you can choose what you really want. You will find that you don't need to trust others as much as you need to trust yourself to make the right choices."

Remember, you are never responsible for the choices of others. You are only responsible for you.

3.  Don't Make Assumptions

When we make an assumption, we misunderstand, we take it personally, and we end up creating a whole big drama for nothing.

4. Always Do Your Best

Action is about living fully. Inaction is the way that we deny life. Inaction is sitting in front of the television every day for years because you are afraid to be alive and to take the risk of expressing what you are. Expressing what you are is taking action. You can have many great ideas in your head, but what makes the difference is action. Without action upon an idea, there will be no manifestation, no results, no reward.

5. The Hidden Fifth Agreement that Renee thinks is also important: Don't lie to yourself when you're in love (for all of us that have been through past relationships that didn't go so well):

"Often when you go into a relationship with someone you like, you have to justify why you like that person. You only see what you want to see and you deny there are things you don't like about the person. You lie to yourself just to make yourself right. Then you make assumptions, and one of the assumptions is "My love will change this person." But this is not true. Your love will not change anybody. If others change, it's because they want to change, not because you change them. Then something happens between the two of you, and you get hurt. Suddenly you see what you didn't want to see before, only now it is amplified by your emotional pain. Now you have to justify your emotional pain and blame for your choices."

p.s. I love you, babe.


There are also two great prayers at the end of the book. It's a great way to re-consider the things that really get us upset and are truly important in life. 

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